Gaslit About Gaslighting

“Gaslighting, although pervasive in our culture, isn’t as commonly used by everyday folk as the accidentally abusive misusage of the word.

“Unintentional Gaslighting” may as well be an oxymoron. It is essentially just disagreement including undetermined (or falsely determined) fallacy. A defense mechanism kicks in causing us to feel victim to anyone who doesn’t validate our perceptions or interpretations. (People should not validate these if they don’t think they are valid – that would be closer to gaslighting in the form of placation. A friendly kind of manipulation).

It is not gaslighting unless someone is trying to intentionally invalidate your reality while simultaneously knowing it to be real themselves with the intent of harm and/or control.

We have all been gaslit but we need a different word for when the impression of this concept is enacted by someone who believes themselves on the subject at hand – a term that recognizes the perpetrator, if they are in fact perpetrating anything but a different perspective, being motivated by their own psychological victimization. A term that recognizes it, when it is in fact taking place, as an violence of ignorance or worse yet, misinformation. A term that recognizes that whoever claims themselves victim of such a thing, may mobilize themselves as perpetrator. A term that recognizes that being wrong is not gaslighting, that disagreement is not gaslighting, that we might be wrong, that encourages inspection for truth amidst differentiating opinion, that draws distinction on intent of manipulation vs. propagation of misinformation and misinterpretation.

If we are honest with ourselves, we see that it is usually possible that each party in the interaction may be guilty of this against each other by the very misuse of terms denoting victim and offender in a disagreement.

If unintentional gaslighting were real then those misusing the term would be guilty ourselves.

I know, it’s kind of a mindfuck, we’ve been gaslit on what gaslighting is.
But, what is psychological abuse if not a ***ing of the mind?

Narcissists are real. (I was unsure for a while)
Unfortunately they have laid out how we ought define and identify them by misdirecting us to attack their victims – each other.

Luv yew ahl
boop
<3”